Now I know that there’s a time and there’s a place where I can choose
To walk the fine line between self-control and self-abuse

The Christmas Season has sneaked up on me this year.
Maybe it’s because I’m poor, maybe it’s because I like to give myself time off work to make pretend like I’m getting a Christmas Vacation, maybe it’s because I don’t shop or watch Television, and mass media has avoided injecting me with Holly and Cheer, but it just came from way out of the blue.
This is a good thing, because I love Christmas above all else.
I love getting and giving, I love eating, I love tinsel and wreaths and decorating, I love having my younger brother come home, I love hearing carols.
But I hate being poor.
It’s gonna be a Walmart Christmas this year.
No, I don’t know what it is. People forget Birthdays. You don’t always have someone on Valentine’s. No one celebrates Flag Day but me.
Christmas is the one time of year where everyone is obligated to at least wish you a Happy Holidays. And I don’t care if you’re Jewish or Kwanzaaish, the good feelings envelop us all, and you can wiggle around in them until New Year’s.
I’ve been neglecting you, dear website, but it’s only because I love you.
I’ve been going out and living the life that, when it slows down again, I can complain about not having anymore.
Ha ha, just a joke. Sort of.
Well, I think I’m going to go make some Rice Krispie Treats with Fruity Pebbles.
Someone mentioned it to me a couple days ago, and I’ve been having a hankerin’ for it ever since.
Ever been in really high spirits for absolutely no reason at all?
Like, content with life?
Yeah, me neither, I’m a fucking waitress.
No wait, that wasn’t where I was going.
What I’m saying is ’tis the season to sit back and appreciate life. For good or for awesome.
Now bring me some figgy pudding and a cup of good cheer.
PS – I’ve updated my wishlist.
I know it’s too late, but there’s nothing like a good New Year’s present for your favorite webmistress.

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