May the Force be with game developers.

Listen, if you’re not a nerd and you don’t like video games and you don’t care about what’s going on in mine, don’t read any further.
As a matter of fact, why are you even here?
Anyway, so, here’s what I suspect happened.
Christmastime is looming on the horizon, and Kotor 2 has just been skeletally concieved. Halo 2 and WoW have just come out and Kotor 1 is still riding on the coattails (Jedi Robe tails?) of the 2003 Game of the Year Award.
So, psh, WHY TEST the fucking game, when you can release it in time for Lauren to find more bugs in it than live in her bathroom?!? (Hyperbolic joke made for emphasis. I have one spider in my bathroom.)
I swear, this game is RIDICULOUS. I can’t believe more people haven’t complained about this!! Maybe I got a bum disk or something.
Each time I encounter something strange, I hop onto gamefaqs to see if it’s explained that I’ve actually done something wrong (likely), but they just blow it off, too!
Granted, they couldn’t be to thorough this soon after being released, but come on. I just read a FAQ that said more or less “Activate a damaged HK unit. Walk two steps. The HK unit will explode. Continue on your way.”
Nothing else. Nothing like “if you had better Computer skills, it wouldn’t explode” or “The explosion actually sets off a security alarm that frees evil robots in the holding room,” NOTHING.
Okay, that I’ll live with.
And okay, I’m not the best at fighting games, all right? I’ve never divvied up my points to their optimal performance, and I died more than a few times in Kotor 1, but I am kicking the bucket every fucking battle here!
As a matter of fact, I was recently hit with 3 assasin droids and I could NOT beat them. All three of my characters would die within seconds of battle (after, by the way, having to sit through a 15-minute long cut scene EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.)
Okay, so I was trying to figure out my options here. I would try to run, but my stubborn compatriots would stay and fight and get killed — SIDE NOTE: another gripe I have with the AI in this game. Sometimes the character I’m controlling will go balls-to-the-wall and whale on the enemy, whilst the two other characters, who I’ve PROGRAMMED to follow closely and attack on sight, hang out three rooms over and comically stretch their arms as if they’re so bored.
On the other hand, I’ve also discovered a sneaky way to “cheat” the game. Sometimes, in the middle of the battle, I will MAKE my character run three rooms over and heal. Now, technically, you’re not supposed to be able to do this when you have unconscious characters, and it takes a LONG time, so I bring a book to read.
But again, sometimes when one character is dead, you’ll lead the other two off to heal, and whichever one you’re not actively controlling will hungrily ignore your commands and run off to fight, and when you force them back in the room, the OTHER will run out. Very frustrating.
So, as I was saying, I was fighting these impossible assasin droids, and in addition to not being able to heal quickly when a character is unconscious, a hard-and-fast rule from Kotor 1 is that you CANNOT go into another section of the map when there’s a fallen character.
Well, I happen to be running around while the Droids hand 2 of my characters’ asses to each other, and they’re lying in the snow, dead, and BY MERE CHANCE, I run off into a snow bank and JUST FOR THE HELL OF IT try to get into another section of the map. AND IT WORKS! Cheap.
I was supposed to get hella experience from these impossible droids, too, I found out from gamefaqs, but I really don’t know how I was supposed to beat them.
I mean, maybe I could understand if I was supposed to lead the WHOLE party away, but I broke a rule in the game and it worked in my favor. Whoop de do.
And that’s just the anomalies. There are some flat-out oversights that are really starting to piss me off. On more than one occasion, my character, who is a GIRL, has been referred to one more than one occasion as a “he.” Ditto the character I played in Kotor 1, which I ALSO made it clear was a girl, has been referenced many times in this game as a “he.” Now that’s just a programming error. Get on the ball, here, people. Porkfry, do something.
Well, it makes me tired just thinking about it.
I’m going to bed!

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