5 things. Fun.

I’m sorry. I just read this on Melissa’s blog and was so appalled that she thought people cared what she had to say, that I just HAD to tag myself and do it.
I kid, I kid.
Serves her right for never once mentioning me on her blog.
NO LINK FOR YOU.
10 years ago I…
D.J.’d a dance party in Switzerland for Halloween.
It wasn’t as hip as it sounds — it was in a hotel lobby with a bunch of 15 year olds who were dressed up in homemade costumes awkwardly dancing to my awful taste in music that probably wasn’t conducive to dancing or socializing OR comfort, such as “Girls” by Beastie Boys or “Nothing Compares 2 U” by Sinead O’Connor.
See? Something for everyone.
5 years ago I…
What was I, a junior in college?
Well, let’s see. I recall playing Final Fantasy 2 alone in my room for a lot of the time.
Ooh! I stayed up for four days straight writing a screenplay.
But this time of year I was…I believe I was dressing up as a Zom-bee as Melissa, Sam, and Sean dressed up as Vam-pirates. Oh, puns.
1 year ago I…
Well, around this time of year, I believe I was in Baltimore chilling with the gang all day and secretly staying up all night to talk to Justin on his computer. The drive home was the first time he called me.
The election was also looming, wasn’t it? So I was in a bad mood all the time because liberals hate me because I’m too conservative and conservatives hate me because I’m too sane.
*sigh* Why can’t bees and pirates just get along?
Nobody wins here, people.
5 Snacks I Enjoy
Salsa, Hummus, Banana Nut Muffins, Cheetos, and, uh…tacos. Is tacos a snack?
How about if you eat it as a side dish to your entree of tacos? Also, dessert: tacos.
5 Things I would do with 100 Million Dollars
Wait, so do I get 500 Million Dollars or 5 things at 20 Million each?
Let’s say 20 Million each so we’re staying realistic here.
First, I’d probably buy an island. How much do islands cost?
How about two islands at 10 Million each? One for all my friends and one for like, homeless kitties and dogs and crap.
Second, I think I’d buy a gaming company and I’d only make adventure games, and not ones that have 600 hours of game-time and real-time aging and infinity outcomes. Also I’d make them funny like the good old times, and with good voice acting. None of that Tidus from Final Fantasy X vagina-talk. “Wah, I miss my world.” Shut up!
Jesus, how much more money do I have to spend?
For my third trick, I’d put 20 Million aside for computers. You know the economy these days.
Fourth wish, I’d make a restaurant chain that looks sort of like the Rainforest Cafe, only there’s animal heads in the wall at each table with a microphone and speaker in them, and they’re the waiter!
There’s really a secret waiter in the back talking into the microphone but you don’t know! And the animals are really sassy but the customers eat it right up and the food is brought out by humans in chains, almost like the animals are the masters.
Right, so if you need a clean fork, for example, you’d ask the moose or bear or whatever real nicely and he’d say something sassy like “Fork you!” or if there’s kids around, “Fork-get about it!” and then “No, I’m just kidding, Slaves, bring these nice people a fork!” and the human would walk out looking all scared and leave the fork and run back off to the kitchen.
If any of you steal my idea, I will sue you.
And for my last 20 Million, I would probably buy someone entertaining to hang out with me.
But who could I afford with a mere $20 Million?
Seth MacFarlane probably makes $20 Million by scratching himself and Conan and Jon Stewart would think I’m an idiot.
So, in conclusion, the guy who plays Lex Luthor on “Smallville.”
He’s so good at being bad!
5 places I would run away to
What, so you can find me?
Switzerland, Nashville, Hawaii, Japan, London.
Yes, clearly, I like to go where I least fit in.
5 things I would never ever ever wear to be seen
One of those t-shirts that says “Bad Girl” in swirly cursive, a short skirt, a shirt where you can see my stomach, one of those shirts with only one sleeve, and high heels, because I’m 5’7″ and although people will tell you that’s average, it’s not, and I stopped thinking that it was cool to be taller than every boy at around 7th grade, so let’s just drop it, okay?
5 favorite TV shows
Family Guy, Monk, The 4400, uhh…Forensic Files? and Mew Mew Power.
5 bad habits
Eating right before bed, never washing dishes, being too sarcastic at inappropriate times, lying, and lying about ever having lied before that last one.
5 biggest joys
Petting kitties, genuinely laughing, playing video games, writing, and eating.
My Only Toys
FuzzTail, my white stuffed kitty my dad got me.
5 fictional characters I would date
Holden Caulfield, because he’s just my crazy type.
Harry Potter, because I think he would date me longer than one book.
Brian Griffin, because who doesn’t like funny alcoholics?
Han Solo, because I have strange childhood fantasies.
Lex Luthor from “Smallville,” because apparently when my mind wanders, it flies right to him faster than a speeding bullet.