Another year down

Well, if you don’t make a year-in-review post, you’re nuthin’ on this internet we call home. It’s also fun for me to go back through my old posts and see what a loser I was a mere 12 months ago, then realize what a loser I still am.
2005, You’ll Always Be Alive…in our hearts
January

-Played Knights of the Old Republic 2.
-A lot.
-Tried in vain to set up my ReplayTV AND get the rebate back from the thieving bastards.
-Continued with my crafty craft knitting.
-Made a hat ridiculously too big for anyone!
February
-Fixed some website crap, including, but not limited to AskHBM, mail submission forms, and comment spammers.
-Did not update because my free time was spent doing boring things listed in the first bullet point.
March
-Went skiing with Tom.
-Got ditched while skiing with Tom.
-I funnenized Aruba with Jordan even before it was cool to be abducted there.
Too soon?
April
-Mitch Hedberg died somewhere around here, but no one believed it because the press didn’t cover it.
Also, I hear his autopsy reports just came in.
Get ready for the biggest shocker of the year — Cocaine and Heroin overdose!
I hope all the whiny kids in the Mitch Hedberg sycophant forums who whined “he had a serious heart condition! Why do you all say he died of drugs?!” are rolling over in their graves, having also died of drug overdoses(/heart conditions?!?!).
-Other things happened.
May
-Justin moved in sometime around here, but neither of us can remember when.
Also, do any of you know where I left my keys?
Is this the airport, Clark?
Is Rusty still in the navy?
-New episode of Family Guy receives lukewarm reviews from internet supersleuth, Lauren. Things only get better from there.
I forgive you, Seth. If my website suddenly came back to life thanks to my fans, I’d repeat all my old jokes instead of making new ones, too.
-I complained about a lot of stuff.
-Jordan and Ryan graduate from their respective learning establishments.
June
-I started to play World of Warcraft.
-Playing video games becomes inversely proportional to my updating my website.
-I also start up my last year working at Theater Camp.
July
-I turn 25.
-I went to Swiss Semester 10-year reunion.
-I find out that I actually haven’t grown up and matured, like I sort of thought I did.
-Crap, I was supposed to make them a website, huh?
August
-I went to a Renaissance Festival and made fun of some people.
-I went to Baltimore and met some kittens.
-George Bush hated Black People.
September
-I moved drove across the entire damn country.
-I won at Roulette in Vegas!
-I settled into a pretty awesome place with pretty awesome landlords.
-I got the cuddliest kitten in the world. (Verified by the World’s Cuddliest Kittens Association)
October
-I basically only talk about my cat for a month.
-My old apartment’s renting company and my old health insurance companies prove to also be thieving bastards.
-Watched a lot of Forensic Files.
-Suspect everyone of murder.
November
-Harry Potter came out.
-I started knitting my Harry Potter Gryffindor scarf.
-Went back home for Thanksgiving.
-Santa stops by early, noticing that the Xbox360s he was planning on giving me and my brother were selling like hotcakes on eBay.
December
-Made crafty craft Christmas ornaments out of bread dough.
-Went home again.
-Santa brings me ergonomic keyboard and gift certificates, despite the fact that I’m 25 years old.
-Santa rocks.
Well, that was more for me than for you, but I enjoy seeing what I’ve accomplished in the past year, so that I can more accurately shape my resolutions for the next.
Namely, “Watch more Forensic Files.”

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